Fav Stand Up Comedian

[BlueSpider]

Im a huge fan of stand up so i was wondering if anyone else was. Post ur fav stand up.
Mine would have to be Chris Rock downloaded some of his stuff and its awesome.
Also Mitch Hedburg is another great standup

[ZrAeNiAn]

Im a huge fan of stand up so i was wondering if anyone else was. Post ur fav stand up.
Mine would have to be Chris Rock downloaded some of his stuff and its awesome.
Also Mitch Hedburg is another great standup

Chris rock? or you serious?... :|

he is like always the same joke.. always how the black man is getting depressed etc. its always the same with him.

The best ive seen so far is "Pablo Fransisco" that guy is a genius!

-Zr-

[Lukasz]

i have some fav. comedians
but they are polish
i dont get many american jokes (black comedian's jokes are so hard to understand at all)

i like french too (with good english translation)
but polish rox :P

[TheImprisonedOne]

Eddy Murphy, without a doubt. Raw and Delirious are soooo funny!

And, of course, some Dutch ones, but you wouldn't know them anyway.

[MDFreak]

Umm, Chris Rock, Nick Burns, Luis Black*funniest white man alive*

I can't get enough of these guys

[Murchie]

Pablo Francisco
Sklar Bros.

Pablo was just freakin funny as hell and very original too.

[DJ Jaime]

Adal Ramones

He's a Mexican Comedian, and he's good! :P
He's a Host in a Program Called " Otro Rollo "

I think you can get some videos of his show in a P2P Software called Kazaa :P

He's good! :D

[Gmex]

carrot top and dave chapelle are my favorites

[ZrAeNiAn]

Eddy Murphy, without a doubt. Raw and Delirious are soooo funny!

And, of course, some Dutch ones, but you wouldn't know them anyway.

Hij is de koning van de lach.. EVIVAAAAA HANS TEEUWEN! :P

-Zr-

[Gmex]

Eddy Murphy, without a doubt. Raw and Delirious are soooo funny!

And, of course, some Dutch ones, but you wouldn't know them anyway.

Hij is de koning van de lach.. EVIVAAAAA HANS TEEUWEN! :P

-Zr-
what=????

[ZrAeNiAn]

Eddy Murphy, without a doubt. Raw and Delirious are soooo funny!

And, of course, some Dutch ones, but you wouldn't know them anyway.

Hij is de koning van de lach.. EVIVAAAAA HANS TEEUWEN! :P

-Zr-
what=????

its dutch.. its a thing from one of the comedians.

baiscly it says: "He is de king of the smile.. eviva Hans Teeuwen"

-Zr-

[Gmex]

Eddy Murphy, without a doubt. Raw and Delirious are soooo funny!

And, of course, some Dutch ones, but you wouldn't know them anyway.

Hij is de koning van de lach.. EVIVAAAAA HANS TEEUWEN! :P

-Zr-
what=????

its dutch.. its a thing from one of the comedians.

baiscly it says: "He is de king of the smile.. eviva Hans Teeuwen"

-Zr-
oh ok thank for cearing that up for me

Chris Rock > all stand ups atm

[Gmex]

mines carrot top he uses props
and dave chappelle have you seen this guy no questions asked

[ColdFire]

haha carrottop....im sick of that guy

chris rocks good

[Anbu Dr J]

CHRIS ROCK AND DAVE CHAPPELLE OWNS ALL OTHER[/u]

[Gmex]

haha carrottop....im sick of that guy

chris rocks good
yes he may get lame after awhile but to me hes still fresh

[ColdFire]

hehehe by now all i can think of when i see him his "call 1800-a-t-t"

[Gmex]

hehehe by now all i can think of when i see him his "call 1800-a-t-t"
ive only seen one of his acts and yes he says it all the time

[Named]

I don't like Chris Rock. Franky because... he's a racist bastard who should really shut his foul mouth.

Funniest stand up? In my opinion it would be Billy Connolly. I've seen MANY great stand ups, but he's always in the front of my mind when someone asks me who's the greatest -_-

Consistently funny for.... over 30 years?

I'll name a few others when my memory returns :?

[Aurora Dark]

Dane Cook.

I don't know why, but something tells me, if I ever were more funny, I'd say jokes like that :P I just love his humor, it's so imaginative and fun :]
Not everyone finds it as funny as I do, but I relate to it a lot (he tells jokes like I do), so that's why I enjoy it :)

"You remember that uh.. remember Nestle's Quik? You know the powder, you put it in your milk. You could stir it for 30 minutes and no matter how hard you f--ing stir it, there were still chunks of powdery magma, that would float up and explode in your eye while you're trying to drink... Take a sip [ARGH] damn sand missile just blew up at my eye! The movie Dune is in my chocolatey drink!!
I don't like when the movie Dune is in my drink..."

But I'll admit. Aside from the jokes themselves, it's his actual movement that is the funniest part. I recommend seeing at least -something- of him sometime. He's a very dynamic, silly personality. Lot of fun :]

[BlueSpider]

I don't like Chris Rock. Franky because... he's a racist bastard who should really shut his foul mouth
i disagree...Chris Rock actually brings up relevant issues in his stand up while being funny...he talks about politics and religion and world hunger and stuff like that and raises some good points...and i wouldnt call him a racist either....he just talks about racism a lot much like every other black comedian

[ZrAeNiAn]

I don't like Chris Rock. Franky because... he's a racist bastard who should really shut his foul mouth
i disagree...Chris Rock actually brings up relevant issues in his stand up while being funny...he talks about politics and religion and world hunger and stuff like that and raises some good points...and i wouldnt call him a racist either....he just talks about racism a lot much like every other black comedian

they talk to much about racism, every joke they make its always like "must be because.. IM A BLACK MAN"... "ever tried to get a taxi as a black man?... if my ass was white id get one in a few seconds.. but noo im black i dont get one" its always the same. Ofcourse he has some good points and yes its funny sometimes... but im getting sick and tired of always hearing "ITS THE BLACK MAN!"....

-Zr-

[BlueSpider]

has anyone heard of Mitch Hedburg? hes an awesome stand up

[Aurora Dark]

has anyone heard of Mitch Hedburg? hes an awesome stand up
-raises hand- That man is teh funneh :lol:

>_> A few of his jokes, for those that don't know him:


I got my hair highlighted, because I felt some strands were more important than others.

I think Bigfoot is blurry, that's the problem. It's not the photographer's fault. Bigfoot is blurry. And that's extra scary to me, because there's a large, out-of-focus monster roaming the countryside. Run. He's fuzzy. Get outta here.

One time a guy handed me a picture of himself, and he said, "Here's a picture of me when I was younger." Every picture of you is of when you were younger. Here's a picture of me when I am older. You son of a b---h, how'd you pull that off? Let me see that camera...

I bought a doughnut and they gave me a receipt for the doughtnut...I don't need a receipt for the doughnut - I give you money and you give me the doughnut, end of transaction. We don't need to bring ink and paper into this. I can't imagine a scenario that I would have to prove that I bought a doughnut. To some skeptical friend, "Don't even act like I didn't buy a doughnut, I've got the documentation right here..."

At my hotel room, my friend came over and asked to use the phone. I said "Certainly." He said "Do I need to dial 9?" I say "Yeah. Especially if it's in the number. You can try four and five back to back real quick."

I hope the next time I move I get a real easy phone number. Something like, 222-2222. I would say sweet. People would say, "Mitch, how do I get ahold of you?" I would say, "Press 2 for a while, and when I answer, you will know that you have pressed 2 enough"

My friend said to me, "You know what I like? Mashed potatoes." I was like, "Dude, you have to give me time to guess. If you're going to quiz me you have to insert a pause."

I like cinnimon rolls, but I don't always have time to make a pan. That's why I wish they would sell cinnimon roll incense. After all I'd rather light a stick and have my roommate wake up with false hopes.

In England Smoky the Bear is not the forest fire prevention representative. They have Smacky the Frog. It's just like a bear, but it's a frog. I think it's a better system, I think we should adopt it. Because bears can be mean, but frogs are always cool. Never has there been a frog hopping toward me, and I thought 'man, I'd better play dead. Here comes that frog...' You never say here comes that frog in a nervous manner. It's always optimistic. Hey here comes that frog, al-right. Maybe he'll come near me so I can pet him, and stick him in a mayonnaise jar, with a stick and a leaf, to recreate what he's used to. And I'm pretty sure I'd have to punch some holes in the lid, because he's damn sure used to air. Then I can observe him, and he won't be doing much in his 16 ounce world.

When you go to a restaurant on the weekends and it's busy they start a waiting list. They start calling out names, they say "Dufrane, party of two. Dufrane, party of two." And if no one answers they'll say their name again. "Dufrane, party of two, Dufrane, party of two." But then if no one answers they'll just go right on to the next name. "Bush, party of three." Yeah, what happened to the Dufranes. No one seems to give a s---. Who can eat at a time like this - people are missing. You f-----s are selfish....the Dufranes are in someone's trunk right now, with duct take over their mouths, and they're hungry. Bush, search party of three, you can eat when you find the Dufranes.


>_>
La
--AD

[Raistlin]

has anyone heard of Mitch Hedburg? hes an awesome stand up
-raises hand- That man is teh funneh :lol:

I bought a doughnut and they gave me a receipt for the doughtnut...I don't need a receipt for the doughnut - I give you money and you give me the doughnut, end of transaction. We don't need to bring ink and paper into this. I can't imagine a scenario that I would have to prove that I bought a doughnut. To some skeptical friend, "Don't even act like I didn't buy a doughnut, I've got the documentation right here..."

I realize this is funny when he says it, but after your accused of shoplifiting so many times at lunch, you start to make sure you get a receit.. I've always had one tho, so it didn't matter.

>.>

Edit: My favourite standup comedian, I've never actually seen him do standup.
I've only seen him on his two shows, The man Show, and Loveline (I listenened to loveline religiously, till the radio station.. evil..)

Loveline Quotes
http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Hills/7133/quotes.html

SoundBoard:
http://www.dolland.net/loveline/sound/index.html

omg, even the ones i've heard are funny
Drew = Dr. Drew Pinsky, addiction/medicine specialist.

CALLER: Well, I'm not doing it when I have my period or anything, I don't do that.
DREW: It doesn't matter when you do that. How--
CALLER: I've never gotten pregnant before.
DREW: Okay, well, you're gonna get pregnant, all right? How do you think you're going to avoid it?
ADAM: Hold on a second. I really think some of our callers were, like, frozen when the Ice Age hit. We thawed them out, and they're just like natives!
DREW: Primitive man.
ADAM: Primitive man, yeah. [in primitive voice] "I never got pregnant before, because, I won't get pregnant because I've never been pregnant before!"
DREW: "Crow fly from right, moon come from sky, no pregnant!"
ADAM: "And if I do get pregnant, all I gotta do is sacrifice a goat, or something, throw it into a volcano, and the baby will go away!" Jesus Christ.



After talking to a girl who said that she was bleeding because she mounted the parking-brake handle of her boyfriend's car:

DREW: Maybe she ruptured the hymen by doing that.
ADAM: What hymen? Anyone who would mount the parking brake handle doesn't have a hymen.



Talking to a caller about paganism:

CALLER: I'm a witch.
ADAM: Well, the real question is, how fat are you?



"Here's the irony of people who like to get into bizarre highs: these are the people who can afford to do it the least. You know what I mean? It's kind of a catch-22. Because you think it's a good idea to suck off of your car's gas tank in the first place means you just have the bare minimum amount of brain cells alloted to a human as is, and you're burning those quick."




After hanging up on a caller, "Ryan," because he seemed hopelessly stupid:

ADAM: You know, there are a few levels of retarded. There's, like, Level 1, and then there's the basement.
DREW: DefCon retarded?
ADAM: Right! DefCon retarded. In the event of some sort of retarded emergency, you crawl into Ryan. There, you'll withstand the bomb.



"I think a lot of our callers think that sperm is like some kind of fossil fuel, something that eventually can be depleted. They don't realize that it's constantly being replenished. And the funny thing is, they still keep masturbating every night."




ADAM: You're 19 and you're still in high school? Were you held back?
CALLER: Yeah, two years.
ADAM: Listen, don't tell anyone you got held back. Here's my suggestion: say you spent two years in Europe when you were a child. What sounds better: "Yeah, I was held back two years," or "Yeah, I spent a summer in Luxembourg, went on a bike tour across France, and naturally, when I came back, I had some catching up to do."

[K3V]

Mitch Hedburg eh?
....
I can't say I found any of those jokes funny.... :(
Me likes Billy Connolly...which is annoying, cos writing this made me realise I just missed him on TV >.< :evil:

my other fav British standups;
Jasper Carrot
Joe Brand
Jack Dee
and Peter Kay (although he can be too vulgar for my liking >.>)

GARLIC BREAD??? XD!!!!

[BlueSpider]

[quote="K3V"]Mitch Hedburg eh?
....
I can't say I found any of those jokes funny....quote]
u really have to hear it for urself...tho some of the jokes may be stupid the way he delivers them is classic
i saw him perform on some comedy gala the other night on tv and these jokes were good
"I stayed in a hotel room with a three way lightbulb and if you dont know a three way light bulb is a three way lightbulb it messes with your head ....cos u go to turn it off and it just gets BRIGHTER...its like dammit lighbulb! thats the exact opposite of what i wanted u to do! and u turn again it gets brighter AGAIN! its like dammit i will break you!"

I saw and informercial on late night tv that said "forget everything you know about slip covers" ...so i did.....and it was load of my mind....then the ad tried to sell slip covers....but i didnt know what the hell they were!

My dog came up to my back door and i gave it a bone and it went and buried it. I wanna plant a tree and put bones on it so my dog will see it and go HOLY SHIT IT WORKED! I HAVE CREATED A BONE TREE! I must distribute these bones equally....
Btw Mitch Hedberg does acid so the way he talks is quite strange

[Named]

It is difficult to choose a favourite stand up. I've seen hundreds and hundreds and rarely is there one who doesn't have a unique style that amuses me :P

That's what happens when you watch comedy festivals, 'Comedy Central presents:' and 'Just for Laughs'. As well as many other less popular stand up shows.
I've seen almost all reputable stand-ups :P I just can't put every name to its related face :lol:
(OK, I have the Comedy Channel on all day...)

I agree with Zr, though... I don't like Chris Rock because he can't leave racial 'issues' alone. His attitude does nothing for racial equality, he only reinforces the borders people like himself have established between the races, i'm sick of it...

[Kitsuki]

All comedians whoa re part of a minority use it to thier advantage its just the way it is.

My favourite comedians would be pablo fransico and will anderson altho will anderson very rarely comes up with new material.

Personally I hate most mitch headburns stuff. His jokes are good but i find he ruins it in the delivery almost everytime. Then again i know heaps who like him so its definatley worth downloading some of his cds.

[ZrAeNiAn]

today a friend of mine showed me some pieces of 2 australian guys, the umbilical brothers. They are very funny, most what they do is just motion, no speach. really funny

-Zr-

[Named]

Yes, YES!

Umbilical brothers are HILARIOUS! I've seen most of their stuff... By far the BEST mimes out there :P
(Yes, they qualify as mimes :lol:

They do have a little bit of speach in their acts... They also verbally create sound effects >_>

[ZrAeNiAn]

Yes, YES!

Umbilical brothers are HILARIOUS! I've seen most of their stuff... By far the BEST mimes out there :P
(Yes, they qualify as mimes :lol:

They do have a little bit of speach in their acts... They also verbally create sound effects >_>

yeah the "fly" fight is very kewl!

when they BBQ yogi and the rest is nice :)

-Zr-

[TheImprisonedOne]

I've seen a tiny bit of the Umbilical Brothers. It was weird, but fun!

[Named]

James bought their newest performance on DVD.
You should buy it, the menu screen is hilarious. They recorded so much for it, it's silly :P

[ZrAeNiAn]

James bought their newest performance on DVD.
You should buy it, the menu screen is hilarious. They recorded so much for it, it's silly :P

its not available here ;)

-Zr-

[ScareCrow]

chris rock is awesome at stand up....i wanna see chapelle do a stand up....

[BlueSpider]

ive downloaded some chris rock and dave chapellle...theyre pretty similar but i still prefer chris rock....but chapelle is still awesome
jeremy hotz is another funny one....a canadian comedian who talks very strange but hillarious nonetheless

[Named]

its not available here ;)

That's what the internet is for ;)

[Onikage-sama]

Chris Rock=I'm Black, laugh at me. He was voted funniest man in America by people magazine and I can't figure out for the life of me why. Even Jerry Seinfeld is funnier. Chappelle doesn't do stand-up very well, he is a sketch comic actor, and he plays the race card too much. Whoever said that minorities always play that card...Ellen Degeneres was hilarious when she still did stand-up and she rarely to never played the lesbian card.

My favorite stand-up performances:
-Robin Williams Live on Broadway
-Eddie Izzard, Dressed to Kill

*Also, Steven Lynch does some pretty funny songs, you might want to check that out.

[Aurora Dark]

Steven Lynch is very funny. Highly offensive and a tad twisted, but a hilarious guy... I often have to resist the urge to sing along :lol:

[BlueSpider]

Im dont get why people still think this about Chris Rock. Ive downloaded 3 of his performances and racism is not the major part of his act. He brings up a lot of issues like world hunger, politics, etc
In his last performance he discussed Iraq, David Blane and Xiegfried (however u spell it) and Roy. He talks about racism a fair bit but does bring up valid points or once even discussed the difference between black people who earn a living and black people who live off welfare
My point is dont listen to 5 mins of chris rock and form an opinion of him that he lives on the one joke. Listen to what he has to say

[Onikage-sama]

I have, and he's not funny.

[Named]

Again, I agree. I've listened to many of his acts. And excuse me for involuntarily tuning him out after a while, there's only so much I can tolerate :lol:
I shouldn't -have- to force myself to watch more of an act I genuinely despise :P That's where you safely draw the "I do not like this performer" line ^^

[Onikage-sama]

I watched a half hour of Jeremy Hotz last night...this man makes me laugh soooooo hard.

[BlueSpider]

James bought their newest performance on DVD.
You should buy it, the menu screen is hilarious. They recorded so much for it, it's silly :P
I bought it today and i see what you mean. I could watch the menus for hrs. Theres something about a beatboxing puppet bear that cracks me up everytime. If you can buy this DVD do so its worth it

[Named]

Yes :lol:! I watched the menu screen for nearly an hour, all the different menus, that is >_>

[BlueSpider]

I still havent seen them all but so far the threatening bears are my fav. What did u think of the actual performance itself?

[.:Alias:.]

My fav one is local, so u wouldn't know him...
but from the "celebs"... I'd choose Eddie Murphy ...
He was sooo hillarious in RAW...

[Hades]

RAW was kool and dilariouse (cant spell)

criss rock isent too bad either

love most of the australian comedians

HATE that sinefeld the show sucks and hes a SHIT comedian.

the umbilical brothers and CRAP i cant think of the name of the other one i like *slaps self*

[Bap]

George Carlin is my favorite i think,...i haven't seen alot though

[K3V]

woo...I'm watching Bill Bailey at the moment... funny guy ^.^
when talking about american rock;
"There's more evil in the top 40 than an Al Quaeda suggestion box"
Peter Kay was on a few nights ago..but he just rehashes the same jokes over and over >.>

[Bap]

i just read all through the 4 pages...has no one heard of George Carlin?? or do i have a horrible sense of humor and no one else likes him? or do i not get out enough to see funnier people? i know i like him more than Dave Chappelle...

[uchiha_melody]

um iam not sure if anyone know'em there british anywayz :
my totall totall favorite 's are:

dawn french ,
Lenny henry
and the fox from blue peter ^^ i find him funny!!

hehe there's alot of comedy on BBc Prime Gold ^^ kyaaaaa

[BlueSpider]

anyone here like Bill Hicks? i listened to some of his stuff a while ago....very wise and funny man

[Bap]

BILL HICKS! i have some stuff of his..pretty funny!

[mizugakuremaru]

1. Patton Oswalt

If you hit a midget on the head with a stick they turn into 40 gold coins
2. Stephen Lynch

Well it seems last night you caught me spankin it No use denying it well I was really crankin it It wasn't my fault
And it wouldn't be so bad If you could just forgive me And talk to me dad

3. Mitch Hedberg

Last week, I helped my friend stay put. It's a lot easier than helping someone move. I just went over to his house and made sure he did not start to load s*** into a truck

[BlueSpider]

i saw eddie murphy raw on dvd not long ago....very very funny....master of celebrity impressions...dellerious is good to ive got it on my comp

[BlueSpider]

HOOLLLLYYYY SHIIITTTT!!! Mitch Hedberg died like two weeks ago! Dammit my fav stand up. RIP you crazy bastard

[Named]

Bill Bailey, "Part Troll"

Funniest stand up i've ever seen in my life... And if you're a fan of Black Books, it will be even -better- >_>

[Blue_Raine]

I don't watch much comedy... but there's this guy called Russell Peters.. Pretty funny, although some would find it offending. I laughed my ass off at the Pacific Mall routine (mostly cause I am Chinese :P )

[pava]

Pablo is good, but nothing beats Eddie's Delarious and Raw!

[Dream_Walker]

dave chapelle's good. so is chris rock

[Dark Zabuza]

my favorutie comedian is a guy from iraq or iran somw ehere from there and hes opverwieght and he stared in the movie the mummy but i cant yet get his name

[snaily sohma]

Mitch hedberg is my favorite, he died like a month ago though ;___;

He is still my hero...

[BlueKyroDragon]

I dont think I could say just one, but I will say that latino and asian comedians are always funny (at least to me)

[Swimmerdude]

Mitch hedberg is my favorite, he died like a month ago though ;___;

I must be lucky because I got to see both Mitch Hedberg and Stephen Lynch on their last tour together and it was awsome. Mitch RIP was great not as good as I hoped but he was still good. When Stephen Lynch came on the laughs just didn't stop he play some new song and they were some of his funniest songs ever.

[sessysgurl]

George Lopez hands down, no competition. I laughed so hard I had a migraine at the end....so then I cried. But if you have seen his stand up "Why you crying" you should. That stuff is awesome!!

[tsunade ^_^]

All time fav and SIMPLY the BEST is Eddie Murphy and second in line is Pablo Francisco!

Eddie's Raw and Delirious was hilarious and Pablo's immitations are sooo flippin gud1

The guy 3rd in line has to be Chris Rock but what do one expect! He learned from the best - mr. Eddie!

[bonkers]

Hhmmm... , I would have to say that my fav would have to be , Mr Pablo Francisco!!!

OOooo, anito, Fernando, mo grande , ito , cha cito ! (Sorry , I don't speak the language, but whem he says it , it's funny as hell and hot as hell, oh shit ,then it must be hell ! jkjkjk lol)

[tsunade ^_^]

PERV

[Lost Prophet]

Seinfeld (NOT!!!!!)

I don't like stand up