View Full Version : My Fic: "longing for him"
Hmm....I'm not really sure about posting this here -.- mainly because I'm shy about work like this :P
But I've been forced by my friend who's wielding my katana and threatening to behead my ikkle kitty teddy if I don't *sniffle*
And I'm not experienced at writing these :P
There's only two chapters at the moment...
But just out of interest, what genre of story do you people like to read?
Ok, temjinxzarron...i just used the link cos i was being lazy -.-
CHAPTER 1;
I don't own Naruto or Hinata or anything related to that anime! Don't sue me! It really wouldn't be worth the effort, me is broke!
As for when this story takes place, this part occurs just after the second part of the Chunnin exam, during the training month before Neji and Naruto, but on no particular day. -.-"
The night was quiet; not even a breeze disturbed the silence. Whereas most people were asleep by now, she stood looking at herself in a full length mirror. She sighed; wearing nothing but her nightie, she examined herself. She used a candle to illuminate the room slightly; she dared not use the room's lights in case someone was to wake up and notice she wasn't asleep.
"Why isn't there any change?" she muttered as she exhaled. "I've been training hard, but it doesn't seem to be having any effect. He would never notice a girl with a body like mine..." She sighed again. She brought her arms in front of her chest and with her hands made the gesture for the transformation technique.
"Henge!" she called out softly, afraid to make her voice too loud. As the dust began to disperse and settle around her, she looked up in the mirror to see the person she admired.
"Naruto...-kun..." She said, blushing slightly. Using the technique, she had altered her physical appearance to that of the village's noisiest ninja. The orange outfit he commonly wore looked brown from the lack of light. She brought her hand up to the reflection of her face on the mirror. She had longed for a picture of him to look at when she felt down, but as she was too nervous to ask him for one, this was the only way she could see him. She stood there silently for awhile, with a million thoughts rushing through her head. Eventually a tear escaped her eye, she was able to see him...but this wasn't what she wanted; she wanted to be with him. The candle burnt out and she was left in the darkness; the overwhelming emotion she was currently feeling causing her to deactivate the technique. She turned around, and, leaning up against the mirror, she slid downwards to the floor. She pulled her legs to her chest and wrapped her arms around them, burying her head into her thighs, and the only sounds audible throughout the night were that of her cries.
It was about midday, and, having no 'missions' that needed her attention, she had resumed her training. She was doing her best, but her concentration kept wandering off to thoughts of him. She wanted to know if he even recognized her from the other girls. He'd spoken to her, but what did he truly think of her?
Finishing her reps of punching the training stump, she wiped the sweat from her brow. It was a typically hot day in Konoha; she was wearing loose clothing that wasn't the most flattering of things, but it was easy to move in, despite being soaked through with sweat. She looked up to the sky; the sun was glowing overhead, indicating it was time for lunch, and, obeying the growls of her stomach, she sat down on a nearby felled log and unwrapped her lunch, which consisted of a few rice balls.
However, sitting down just allowed her mind to wander further into her thoughts. She was now experiencing self-doubt and despair, as she decided that no matter how hard she worked, she'd never be able to tell him the things she wanted to. All she wanted was to be with him. Tears started trickling from her eyes again as she bit into the rice ball; however, she was startled out of her thoughts as a nearby voice called out her name.
"Hinata-chan?"
Surprised, she instinctively twisted her body to face the voice without thinking. Her eyes widened and her cheeks turned crimson.
"N...N..Naruto-kun!!" She gasped; then, feeling the tears falling down her cheek, she turned away in embarrassment, wiping her face.
"Umm...." Naruto closed his eyes thinking to himself, "Boy, why does she always act like this? And why is she even out here?" He walked over and sat on the same log; looking at her, he noticed she had once again moved her head so that it was facing away from him. "So whatcha been up to?" he asked for a lack of other questions. He could see her trembling slightly as she turned her head so that he could finally see her face, but she was still just looking at the ground.
"Training" she said quietly. Naruto barely heard it, but he was used to this from Hinata, and had grown accustomed to it. "I..." she started to say something, but it just turned into a series of "umms" and "erms". Naruto was used to Hinata acting like this, but he didn't know how to deal with it well. He looked at the stump, noticing it was stained with something red. He knew it was blood, but what puzzled him was that it seemed fresh. He peered down at Hinata's hands and was surprised to see them so scuffed and bloody.
"Hinata-chan!" he exclaimed, causing her to jump and turn around in surprise. Naruto took her hand in his, raising it nearer his face, and inspecting the wounds; Hinata sat in shock feeling her heart faster and faster; so much blood had rushed to her cheeks that she began to feel faint. "How hard were you training? Why'd you carry on if you'd beaten your hands up so much?" Hinata was barely able to think, let alone respond to him. Looking away again, she regained some composure and timidly replied.
"I'd never get....stronger.. if I.." Hinata stopped again, blushing intensely. She didn't finish her sentence, but Naruto felt he knew what she was saying. He looked back down at the blood leaking from her bruised knuckles; using the sleeve of his jacket, he gently wiped some of the blood up.
"Hinata...You want to become strong too?" he asked her. She noticed the usual energy in his voice had disappeared and been replaced with a much more serious tone. She couldn't bring herself to answer; she just nodded slightly, barely moving her head.
"But why?" he now inquired. No one had asked her this before, but she had run the answer through her head plenty of times. There was a brief silence as Hinata took her hand out of Naruto's and turned away again. Silently, she slowly summoned some courage, while Naruto looked at the back of her head, although he wasn't really focusing on it. After a few deep breaths, she looked up at the leaves on the nearby trees.
"Because....I.." she paused again, but was determined to finally say this to him. "I want...someone....to notice me." Naruto was slightly taken aback by this. Naruto had constantly been trying to improve his ninja skills so that he could compete with Sasuke. All he wanted was Sasuke to acknowledge him as a good ninja...Hinata just wanted someone's acknowledgment as well. Hinata looked back at the ground and this time, Naruto did the same. Neither said a word as an awkward silence lingered in the air. It was suddenly broken by Hinata, who had suddenly burst into tears, but before Naruto could question, she started blurting out her troubles.
"Neji said that I should just forget training and being a ninja. He said I have no hope of being a ninja because we just depend on the branch family to do all our fighting for us." She had burst into tears and couldn't hold herself back now. Naruto had no idea how to react in this situation, but he cursed Neji's name for doing this to his own family.
"Neji...you ..asshole" he muttered. Naruto looked at her with sympathy; all his life people had been telling him to give up, and that he had no hope of achieving his dreams. He knew the pain of it well enough; he could barely handle it himself. He'd always been alone, without anyone there to reassure him other than his former instructor Iruka, but for the longest time he knew that whenever he felt like Hinata did right now, he just wanted someone to hold him and tell him it would be OK. However, how could he do it to her; how would she react? Any time he'd even attempted it with Sakura he'd ended up battered and bruised.
Hinata continued to cry and Naruto felt his heart sink. He took one last gulp and closed his eyes. He leaned in closer to her, and, slowing raising his arms, he gently wrapped them around her and pulled her close to his chest. He put his cheek on the back of her head and whispered,
"I'm sorry Hinata-chan...Sorry that you have to feel such pain, I've know what its like, and I wouldn't wish it unto anyone...especially not you" Hinata had become completely paralyzed, stunned at her situation. She was actually in his arms! Was this a dream? The tears had stopped almost instantly from the shock. She couldn't respond; she just wanted this moment to last forever. "I...I never had anyone when I was alone, and no one was willing to help me." He paused. "I don't really know what I can do to help, but if you'll let me I'll do my best!"
He placed his hands on her shoulders and gently pushed himself away, so that he could she her face. He smiled. Seeing his smile gave her all the courage see needed; she wanted to always see that smile, it comforted her, it made her feel that she was noticed...by him.
"Naruto-kun.....thank you" she bowed her head. Naruto stood up and stretched.
"If you want, I'll help you train; after all I'm the village's best ninja!" She noticed the energetic Naruto had returned. That was what she loved about him, his undying confidence and self-belief.
"Train?" She responded in her typically quiet voice.
"Yeah! Umm...unless you want something else from me?" he asked with his eyes closed.
"Ahh! No!" She looked away in embarrassment again. Blushing, she looked over her shoulder slightly, "I...I would like that." She looked away again. Naruto laughed a little, although he found it a little irritating at times, he liked Hinata like this; she wasn't noisy, and she never got angry at him like all the other girls. It was then that he realized that he had a soft spot for Hinata, one that he didn't even know existed. He smiled and looked up at the sky; using the sun as a guide he assumed that it was getting past lunchtime.
"Well I was going to train here, but I'm gonna go back to the village. There's a lunchtime special on ramen!" he shouted. Hinata looked up at him, and his eyes met hers as he looked down at her. "I'll see you later, OK? See ya!" he called as he started running away in the direction of the village.
"N..Naru..." she quietly called as he ran off, but it was too late; he wouldn't be able to hear her. Why couldn't she shout louder? She sighed, wishing that he would have asked her to go with him. Looking down, she noticed her rice balls; picking one up, she took a small bite out of it as she pondered to herself.
"Just training ... " she sulked slightly as she wished it could be more. But it changed into a smile "Training....with him!" Smiling, she took another bite, and looked up, noticing clouds that formed a shape that she was certain resembled....him.
temjinxzarron
09-03-2004, 11:29 PM
don't be shy about it. Just go with the flow. and one more thing. Instead of having a link to your fic could you post it on this site. Thanx
And here is;
CHAPTER 2;
The mood of almost the entire village was one of mourning. They had lost their leader, and everyone was uncertain of what the future would hold. Already, two weeks had passed since the 3rd Hokage's death. Normally, she'd be just as upset as everyone else, but ever since Naruto had been helping her, she couldn't smile but have a slight smile on her face whenever it was their time. The sun beat down on the people of Konoha, in an attempt to brighten up the mood of the village. Looking up at the sky, she felt as happy as if her soul was flying with the birds up amongst the clouds. Currently, she was aimlessly walking along the empty streets of the village, enjoying the weather and thinking of him, without anyone else around to disturb her.
She heard a loud cry of exclamation from a voice that could only belong to him; there was only one person who would shout out that loud. She smiled and gently jogged in the direction of the voice. Now the voice was only around the corner; she leaned up against the wall blushing, and slowly peered around it, but only enough so that she could see him without being seen herself. He was still speaking loudly to someone; she looked further to see Sakura, the girl she envied more than anyone else due to the attention and affection she received from Naruto. Listening in, she hoped no one would notice her....
"....and it'll be for a while, I don't know how long," Naruto said. Hinata wondered what they were talking about.
"Well why are you telling me? It's not like I care or something." Sakura replied, folding her arms, pouting as she looked away from Naruto. He sighed.
"I just wanted you to know." Naruto looked at the floor and started pacing back and forth a little; Hinata could see his cheeks had turned slightly red; she wondered what he was thinking. "Umm...Sakura-chan...would you....miss me?" Sakura, still with her head turned away from Naruto, looked at him through the corner of her eye.
"Why would I miss you? Ever since we teamed up as genins, all you've done is get between me and Sasuke-kun." Naruto was stunned; he'd dealt with rejection all his life, but he didn't know how to respond to it this time. It became obvious to Naruto that Sasuke hadn't told her how hard he'd fought against Gaara to save her....he probably took all the credit himself. Naruto's sadness turned into anger as his thoughts turned to Sasuke. Sakura took a couple of steps forward and stopped. "Whatever Naruto; go on your little adventure, I really couldn't care if you never returned. See ya!" She then walked off into the distance as Naruto stood there, mortified.
Hinata hid back behind the corner, out of sight of Naruto, and leaned up against the wall. She brought her hand to her mouth.
"Little adventure?" she thought to herself. "Does that mean Naruto-kun is going away? Why didn't he tell me?" These thoughts bringing tears to her eyes, she cried out without realizing. She suddenly heard footsteps from around the corner; they were getting closer. Hinata turned and fled, not wanting anyone to see her like this. Naruto walked around the corner to see Hinata's back getting further away.
"Hinata-chan?" he said inquisitively.
She was back at the training area, leaning up against the tree, looking at the stumps that she had trained so hard with under the guidance of the boy she loved. Why didn't he even bother to tell her he was going away? Did he really think that little of her? So many questions she wanted to ask him, but lacked the confidence to do so. Naruto was supposed to be here one hour ago, "but he'd probably gone after Sakura", she thought to herself. She could take on the world with him around, but without him here, all she could do was sit and weep silently.
But wait, she heard the rustling of leaves; she looked around and saw that to her right, some birds had taken flight from a nearby bush. Hinata smiled slightly as she observed the birds flying around, engaging in a dance with each other. She suddenly froze when a hand appeared on her left shoulder; she dared not look around.
"Hinata-chan." a voice said; it was his voice! She looked around and then up to see his face, as he smiled down at her. "I had a feeling you'd be here. I'm sorry I didn't come to help you today...umm...something's kinda come up." Hinata shook her head.
"No...it's OK" she replied quietly, lowering her head as she did. Naruto sighed
"It's not!" he shouted, although his voice suddenly sounded dismayed. "I wish I could have told you this earlier, but I only found out myself today." Hinata looked up at him again.
"You're going away?" she asked, to which Naruto responded with a quiet "Un". Hinata paused for a moment. "I heard earlier."
"It's not like I'll be gone forever, I will come back, OK?" Naruto was grinning at her, with his thumb sticking up . Hinata jumped slightly from this sudden change in volume of Naruto's voice, but then smiled, and as usual, she blushed, looking down at the floor
"Umm....I hope you'll come back soon," she said. Naruto looked surprised. "I'll...miss......you...." she now looked up at him, "Naruto-kun." He suddenly started working things out; he noticed that Hinata would miss him in the same way he thought he would miss Sakura...did she really feel that way! He was suddenly taken aback, because that would mean....she...loved ...him! He'd never thought about it this way before. But should he say something? If he didn't, she may just get angry at him like Sakura always did. He started blushing himself, and an awkward silence feel between them. He knew he better say something, as even Naruto realized that Hinata would not be the one to do it.
"Hinata-chan," Naruto's voice was trembling slightly; this was something Hinata had never heard; normally he was so self-confident. "I never really thought about it....but I guess I just realized...I'm going to miss you too." Upon hearing this, Hinata's eyes widened in shock. "This time we've spent together recently.....you're so kind to me Hinata-chan.....everyone else seems to be glad to see the back of me..." Now something Hinata never would have dreamed of happened...Naruto's eyes began to well up with tears, and although he tried to hide them by looking away and hiding his eyes with his arm, she knew they were there. "Iruka-sensei...was the only one who saw me as Naruto....everyone else...is so distant." Hinata wondered what he meant by "saw him as Naruto", afterall, what else could he be? Now Naruto's tears were flowing down his cheeks; not even his arm was enough to cover it up now. Hinata had no clue what was wrong, and despite her timid nature, she pulled herself closer to Naruto, wrapping herself around his waist with her arms. This achieved the effect she desired; his tears ceased to fall. He was too surprised to cry right now, he had no clue what Hinata was up to, but he felt warm where she was clinging to him, he'd never been so close to someone else before to experience this. It wasn't just a simple hug like before; this felt like....pure love.
"Naruto-kun....I think...I think..." he could tell she was terrified of her actions from the shaking of her voice. She took a big breath and continued. "I don't think you should cry...I believe there are many people who will wait for you to return...and if no one else cares...then I’ll care for you on their behalf." She hadn't planned to say so much, but the emotion of the moment had taken over. She now cringed and buried her face into the material of his jacket, forgetting that his chest was just behind it.
So she did feel that way about him. He'd never even felt the love of a parent, how was he expected to recognize love when he saw it? He'd been so obsessed with Sakura, he never considered that anyone could fall in love with..him. He smiled and wrapped his arm around Hinata, causing her to shiver.
"Hinata-chan...I never really thought about you...I guess I never expected someone to feel like this for me," Naruto explained to her, looking at the sun to judge the time. "I wish there was more time for us to talk...but I've got to get going...sorry." Hinata looked up from her place in his chest and although blushing, she was smiling; a smile that look a lot happier than any she had shown before.
"It's OK...I'll wait for you," she replied. "However long you're gone....I'll be waiting." She placed her cheek on Naruto's arm now, holding it there with her hands; Naruto stood up, and due to the way Hinata had latched onto him, she was brought up too. Naruto noticed she wasn't looking at him, he guessed she just wanted to savor these few moments, and decided he owed her something for her kindness. Blushing he brought his face towards her. Hinata with her eyes closed didn't notice this advancement, until she felt something warm pressed against her beet red cheek. Opening her eyes she quickly pulled away due to shock. Naruto had no clue what to do and already doubted that he should have done that. He was breathing quickly; even faster than Hinata.
"Hinata! I'm so sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you like that!" He pleaded with her, but Hinata's expression remained unchanged and she stood there speechless. "I...I...I'm sorry!!! I..I better go!" Before a word could escape her mouth, Naruto had already fled the scene, leaving behind many unanswered questions in Hinata's mind. But the only one she desperately desired an answer for was; "Does this mean Naruto-kun feels the same way?"
Alone amongst the trees, the silence was suddenly broken by the chirping of birds. Hinata finally moved as she peered over at them. It was the ones she had noticed earlier, sitting next to each other; one on a branch, the other in a nest, keeping their eggs warm. She brought her hand to the cheek that Naruto had kissed, silently watching as the birds flew into the sky once again, dancing in flight. She made a wish...that she and Naruto would be together...as close as those birds.
temjinxzarron
09-04-2004, 12:46 AM
Nice plz continue to be honest your a lot braver than me when it comes to these types of fics
Lukasz
09-04-2004, 05:15 PM
yes, very nice (i dont see grammar and sentences mistakes so the fic is written awsome in my opinion ;) )
love story which i like :P cool
^.^ thanks guys....there's no mistakes because I found a friendly person who is willing to proof read it. I hope to have the next chapter done by monday.
Edit: Thanks to Fungus' pestering (:P) I already have the next chapter done.
Here we go;
CHAPTER 3;
This time this is just before Naruto briefly returns to Konoha after Sasuke was beaten up by Itachi.
=====
She was standing in an open field, with nobody around to bother her. It was another hot day; even the insects were basking in the heat. Breathing steadily, and with her eyes closed, she raised her hands to her chest and formed a seal.
"Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" she shouted. Instantly, smoke and dust flew up around her. Panting slightly, she slowly opened her eyes. She was greeted by two clones that were smiling at her. She smiled and then let herself fall backwards, landing on the dry grass, which softened her fall as she hit the earth. As she gasped for air, the clones were dispelled in a cloud of smoke; she was unable to keep the clones active due to her exhaustion.
"Finally....two clones..." she said, sighing contently as she recovered from the hours of training she had spent trying to improve the technique she had been taught by the boy she loved; Uzumaki Naruto. It had taken her a whole month to be able to create even one shadow clone; she hadn't expected it to be so difficult. "No...wonder it’s... a forbidden technique." She looked up at the deep blue sky, her thoughts turning to him, the person she was working so hard for. She smiled to herself, "Naruto-kun.....I hope you're safe." She giggled as she imagined his grinning face in the sky. "Come back soon!" She sighed, still smiling.
The days continued to pass. Hinata was dealing with Naruto's absence better than she expected to. She had decided that if she kept herself busy, it would keep her mind occupied, and prevent her thoughts straying to him. She was currently relaxing at the village's fountain, recovering from the day's training. The combination of the cool breeze and the soothing humidity created by the water made the perfect spot to revitalize. This peacefulness was soon shattered by a girl running frantically down the street, the pink hair immediately identifying her. Before Sakura even got to Hinata she was already screaming.
"Hinata! Have you seen Sasuke-kun?" Sakura had finally reached Hinata. Struggling for air, she continued. "He left...the hos..hospital." She paused again to regain her composure, and then finally finished her sentence. "I think he's probably gone after Naruto!" The volume of Sakura's voice made Hinata edge backwards, trying to create room between them.
"I...I haven't seen him!" she replied. Hearing this, Sakura immediately ran off. Hinata just watched her leave, wondering what it was Naruto saw in her. "I wonder if Naruto-kun is OK..." She pondered this as she walked towards the village's main gate. When she arrived, she sat on a nearby bench on the outside of the Konoha perimeter, gazing down the road at the sunset. Sakura just mentioning Naruto's name earlier had brought him to the front of her mind, and the more she thought about it, the more painful it felt. She was slumped on the bench, praying for Naruto to return. Through tear-filled eyes she looked up, and saw two figures approaching. She dismissed them as other ninja returning from a successful mission. However, she wiped the tears that had built up away, and focused on them. She gasped, bringing her hand to her mouth. Even though they were so far away, her Byakugan allowed her perfect sight of them; it was Naruto! He was traveling with some strange, white-haired man, who was carrying Sasuke. She stood up from the bench, slowly walking towards them. She saw Naruto running in her direction, then heard a cry of,
"Hinata-chan!" She stopped and smiled as he reached her.
"Naruto-kun...you've come back already?" she asked.
"Ahh...not exactly," he replied, looking over his shoulder at the white-haired person who was walking towards them. She looked at Sasuke, who appeared to be unconscious. Naruto looked back at her. "Sasuke got injured...we had to bring him back." The white haired man looked at her and proceeded to walk straight past them. "That guy's Jiraiya...he's been training me; that's why I had to leave the village."
"Training?" She smiled. "So what has he taught you?" Hearing this, Naruto sighed.
"Absolutely nothing...except that he's a complete pervert!" Naruto said laughing, causing her to giggle.
"I was training with the shadow clone technique while you were gone," she told him. "I wanted to be a lot better by the time you got back....but you returned soon than I expected." She giggled again. This had an effect on Naruto, causing him to smile. He liked the way Hinata was behaving.
"Show me?" he asked Hinata, causing her to blush.
"Umm...I'm not really all that good yet." she responded, and started fumbling with her hands.
"Come on, show me how many clones you can make!" he said trying to encourage her. She positioned her hands to form the seal for the technique, and tried to control her breathing, even though she was embarrassed.
"Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" she called out, creating smoke that engulfed her and Naruto. As it cleared, Naruto could see that Hinata was dismayed. He looked around to see another Hinata looking at him, both looked tearful.
"I...was able to...make two a couple ....of days ago," she said as her lips trembled. Naruto assumed that she must have been working hard everyday, and was disappointed after only managing to produce one clone. The duplicate Hinata disappeared; Hinata looked at Naruto, and with sad eyes, sighed. "Sorry." Naruto walked closer to her.
"Hinata...it doesn't matter, you don't have to prove yourself to me," he told her, putting his hands on her shoulders, to which she responded by looking away, blushing. "Hinata-chan...I had some time to think while I was gone...I saw that old guy constantly chasing women like a pervert...I thought about all the time I spent chasing Sakura-chan, just because she's pretty..." He paused; Hinata unhappily sighed a little, noticing this. Naruto raised his head, staring into space. "I finally understand....it’s not love I feel for Sakura-chan...I think Jiraiya said its something called lust.... but the way I felt around her is nothing compared..." he looked back down at Hinata, who was now gazing up at him intently. This made Naruto blush, and now he looked away, taking a deep breath. "...compared to the way I feel around you.....Hinata...I..."
"Naruto....kun?" she asked, desperately wanting to hear what he had to say. Naruto looked deep into her eyes.
"I......" Naruto continued to stutter. He closed his eyes, trying to force himself to get the words out; however, this created a long silence. Finally he opened his eyes. "I..love you....Hinata-chan....I'm certain of it." He broke away from Hinata and turned his back to her as he breathed heavily. Hinata was stunned; only in her dreams had he told her those words. "This must be another dream," she thought to herself. The aching and joy in her heart, on the other hand, convinced her that this was reality. As she was trying to gather her thoughts, Naruto was becoming increasingly paranoid. He saw this silence as rejection from Hinata; from his experience, when people didn't like what he said, they became quiet.
"Naruto!" a booming voice said from behind the two. Turning around, they saw it was the white-haired pervert Naruto was traveling with. "Naruto, we have to get going. Sasuke's safe at the hospital; we're done here." He once again walked straight past them.
"Yeah..." Naruto quietly responded. Naruto started following him; however, he stopped as Hinata placed her hand on his shoulder. But despite her deep desire to tell him how she felt, her mouth would just not move. Naruto had had enough of this silence; he pulled away from her hand and ran after Jiraiya. This left Hinata alone, and all she could do was watch as the person she cared for so much walked away with pain in his heart; and despite all this, she could still not bring herself to run after him, or even call out the words she so desperately wanted to. All she could do was be the one left behind as tears streamed from her eyes, as she repeated the words she wanted to say over and over in her mind.
"Naruto-kun....I love you too!"
Just don't expected the next part to be done so quickly.... ^.^
temjinxzarron
09-08-2004, 02:10 PM
mega xlr style
nice
VentMonster
09-11-2004, 04:43 PM
very nice keep them coming
ZrAeNiAn
09-11-2004, 06:27 PM
K3V i must say im very impressed :)
keep it up ;)
-Zr-
Fungus
09-11-2004, 10:49 PM
<flails arms>
wheres chapter 4!!!
<runs around in cirlces franticly>
ZrAeNiAn
09-14-2004, 12:22 PM
K3V?.. chapter 4 ready yet?
-Zr-
Sadly...no...I haven't had much time for it recently -.-" add that to writers block :(
I'll try to get it done by friday :P
At least Fungus can stop pestering me now
Fungus
09-14-2004, 02:08 PM
i guess....
if you need any help, just give me a buzz and ill try and help you out.
It's taken over a month due to problems at home...but I finally motivated myself to finish the story...
I actually spent quiet a long time creating the perfect story that would fit in...as many of the scenarios that I came up with didn't suit the character of either Hinata or Naruto...
So my apologises to people...especially Fungus :P me glomp you to make up for it *glomp*
I hope that people will appreciate the chapter and that you will enjoy it...
the final chapter...entitled"It all led to you"
====
It was another rainy day; there had been many over the last few days, thus bringing down the mood of the entire village. However, this had no comparison to the depression she was feeling. The open window filled the room with cold air, as she leaned on the frame; the rain splashing against her face, then trickled down her cheeks, combining with the tears flowing from her eyes. Her head in her hand, she stood, staring blankly into space; her mind wasn't concentrating on reality, and instead retreated to thoughts of the boy she loved.
It had only been ten days since he had left the village, but for her, every day was prolonged and felt more like a week in itself. The constant uncertainty of not knowing how long he'd be away was the hardest part for her. Now she knew what his feelings to her were, all she wanted was an opportunity to tell him that she felt the same way.
Raising her head she closed the window, and slumped back up against it, her head facing the floor. As she looked up, the mirror on her dresser caught her sight. Thinking for a moment, she slowly walked up to it and examined her reflection. She was only wearing her nighty, as she had no intention of leaving the house; her eyes were red and swollen, and her nighty soaked through, and her skin moist. She brought her hands up to her chest and formed the seal for the transformation technique;
"Hen...." she softly called, but then paused halfway through. Her head drooped and her hands fell to her sides as she let out a sigh. She leant forwards resting her forehead on the mirror, as fresh tears leaked from her eyes;
"Naruto...kun" she sniffled; "Where...are you?"
A few more days had passed, and the rains had finally stopped. The people of the village had resumed their work on re-building the village, which had been paused due to the constant rain making the re-construction near impossible. Although she had planed to stay in her room again, the hustle and bustle of the outside had lured her out. But she just ended up aimlessly wandering the streets with a vague smile on her face, trying not to let others see how upset she was.
As the sun beat down, she decided to rest for a little, as she had been walking for a lot longer than she realised. She went into a nearby cafe to order a drink, and have a quick sit down, however, while in the queue, she noticed that the place wasn't lively, it was just loud, and today, she didn't have the patience to put up with it. After receiving her drink, she took it out the cafe and escaped to one of the vilage's gates, which she knew would be quiet, as Konoha wasn't currently accepting buisiness, and almost everyone had been pulled away from their usual duties to help with the work in the town.
It was as quiet as she expected, only the chirping of the birds and the breeze rustling the leaves on the trees gave life to the place. Sitting on the grass, she reflected on Naruto; she had decided that the best way to pass the time would be to come up with a special way to apologise to him, and then to let him know her secret desire for him, which she had haboured for so long. It was after a while of contemplation that she realised that this was the same place Naruto had revealed his feelings for her. With this in mind, she decided she would put right what went wrong last time, but would she really be able to let such words escape her lips? She brought the sleeve of her jacket to her mouth and gently nibbled on it for comfort, and also to help her relax.
Holding the cool drink in her other hand, she closed her eyes and brought it to her cheek, which made her shiver as the cold of the container refreshed her heated skin. She moved it up to her forehead, and brought it back and forth over her skin, as she continued to bite down on her jacket, trying to think of a way she could show Naruto her feelings, without having to say them out loud.
While in thought she heard voices coming from the distance, which slightly iritated her, as the reason she had come to this place was to avoid the selfish shouting of other people, who had no desire to respect her silence. Her eyes still closed she removed the material from her mouth and finished off her drink; leaving her free to pull her legs into her chest and wrap her arms around them as she now bit down on her bottom lip. In this position, she felt cut off from everyone else, and that's what she wanted at that moment; so at least she'd be able to think about him without fear of interuption. However, the plan was ruined as she heard someone call out to her;
"Hinata...chan" she recognised the voice; it was male, but it didn't sound right; normally this voice was filled with so much energy, but this was more filled with sadness. However, despite it not being able to belong to him, she slowly raised her head until she had eye contact with this person, which caused her to freeze. Paralysed she continued to blankly stare at the person in front of her. The boy in front of her turned his head away, and just as it was in his voice, the sadness was etched on his face.
"N...N...Naruto-kun!" she gasped, having no idea what to say. Naruto had been away for a while, but instantly noticed one thing; Hinata had reverted to being the quiet and reserved girl she used to be, something that upset him. He had confessed his feelings for the girl in front of him, and had received a harsh silence in return. He wanted to return the pain he had felt at that point, but he couldn't, for one, that would make him as bad as Sasuke in his eyes. Hinata was still curled up, not knowing whether this was just a wonderful dream. She looked down back into her knees, causing her soft voice to be muffled; "Are you...back for good this time?" she asked. Neither of them were looking at each other at this point.
"Yeah....We found the new Hokage..." He paused to let out a sigh as he scratched the back of his head; "Hinata-chan, I...I shouldn't have said what I did before I left" Hearing this caused her to instantly bring her head up to him, and he looked back at her, once again making eye contact, so they were in the same situation as a minute ago. "Ever since then its been on my mind, beating me up inside, wishing that I'd said it so much sooner. I'm just....sorry" he solemly said, but noticed Hinata was sweating a lot. In Naruto's mind, he decided that this was because she was nervously trying to think up of a way to tell him that she didn't feel the same way about him; Naruto knew she was to kind to simply say "I don't like you".
"Naruto...kun..." she said, gulping, as she began to feel light-headed. "I..." she suddenly felt her body fall backwards onto the grass, although she never told it to, it was acting on its own. She felt her eyes closing and a loss of conciousness, as she stuggled to finish her sentance; "love....you" however, these words were barely audible, and Naurto in his confused state was in no condition to hear them, just as she was in no condition to say them.
Naruto was screaming at Hinata to open her eyes, shaking her body in an attempt to wake her up, but to no avail. He took his jacket off and placed it behind her head, to raise it slightly. While desperately trying to think what to do, he remembered that the old lady was a medical specialist. He looked up trying to see them in the distance, now wishing that he hadn't run so far ahead just to get back to the village as quickly as possible. He leant down next to her, and took her hand between his two looking at her closed eyes;
"Hinata-chan...Please be OK...I'll be back in a minute" he said to her, unsure of whether she'd hear him or not; ". . .I promise!" He quickly rose and ran back in the direction he had travelled from, then stopped. He couldn't leave her here, his love wouldn't let him. "Dammit! What do I do?" he cried as he punched himself in the head. As he recovered from the slight pain, it seemed to have done some good, he looked up and cried out; "Kage Bunshin No Jutsu!" The technique kicked up a lot of dust, but as it settled around him, a Naruto clone ran straight for where he knew the pervert and the old lady would be, as Naruto himself returned to the side of Hinata, once again holding her hand. He smiled slightly, and quietly said "I told you. . ."
A few minutes later a couple of figures came running down the road, causing Naruto to look up, but he wouldn't leave Hinata's side now. Besides, Naruto knew who it was, the shape of "grandma" Tsunade was too distinctive to confuse with anyone else.
"What's wrong?" He heard Tsunade cry out. Naruto waited until they arrived before bothering to answer, he just continued to hold her hand.
"I have no idea...." he replied; "She just seemed to pass out" Tsunade had now slowed down to a walking pace, and as she approached notcied Naruto holding her hand. She hadn't thought Naruto was capable of having such feelings due to his immaturity. He was surprising her more and more each day. She smiled as she gently motioned him out of the way;
"Let me take a look then" she said, placing her hand on the forehead of the young girl, then brought her ear to Hinata's chest. As she rose, she brushed her hair out of her face; "It's ok, she just has a minor heat stroke...she must have been waiting here for you for some time" she reported, giving Naruto a little wink, although Naruto was oblivious to what the wink was supposed to mean. Tsunade's hand glowed green as chakra emniated from it, she hovered her hand over Hinata's forehead for a few seconds, before the glow ceased. "She'll be fine" Tsunade reported with a smile. She now looked back at the other two members of their travelling party, Shizune and Jiraiya, both of whom from the heat, looked in a worse condition than Hinata. "Come on you two!" she shouted as she turned around and walked through the gates of Konoha, causing Jiraiya so whine;
"I wanna go to a hot spring" he moaned, causing Shizune to complain under her breath
"We just came from one you dirty old pervert!". As they exchanged words, they continued to follow Tsunade into the village, leaving Naruto to scratch his head and think about just how weird and dirty grown ups were.
"Naruto-kun?" He heard from below, looking down he saw Hinata's face; her eyes now open, although her face red, which could have been from the heat, or just her normal blushing. Whichever it was, Naruto was just glad to see her awake again, he smiled, and without thinking embraced her.
"Hinata-chan!" He didn't know why, but tears were being released, and the more he fought them, the more came out. He started sniffling, but contineud; "I'm so happy...you're OK" He pulled away gently, but left his arms around her shoulders, so they were face to face again. Hinata saw the tears falling from his eyes, not completely sure of what had just happened, or how long she'd been unconcious for, but this sight was too much for her emotions. Now completely overwhelmed by them, she was able to overcome her usual inhibitions, and pulled herself to his chest, placing her cheek upagainst his t-shirt, as she embraced him back.
"Please don't cry Naruto-kun!" she told him, begining to cry herself, partially from the flood of emotions raging through her mind at the moment, but also just because his crying made her do the same. She just quietly sobbed upagainst him, as Naruto still crying was kind of shocked, his arms had just fell to his sides after Hinata wrapped herself around him. he slowly looked down to see the purple hair that could only belong to Hinata. Another sudden rush of tears came out, as he leaned his head forwards, and placed his cheek on top of her head, then as he did, once again placed his arms around her, holding her close to him. The two of them now just sat there in each others arms, crying. Neither cared who would see them, as that was the least of their thoughts, the only thing on their minds right now was each other.
"Hinata..." Naruto began to say through the tears; "Like I said...I'm sorry for what I said before... I should have thought about how you.."
"No Naruto-kun!" Hinata said cutting him off. Still clutching at him, with her head buried in his body; "please don't ever feel that you have to be sorry" She didn't know how she was managing to say these things; she just seemed to think them, and her body immediately spoke them without her permission, which was giving her a headache, as she fought with all these feeling and emotions, but knew she had to say one more thing before she could stop; and she had to say it now! "Besides...I...I..." She was cusring herself inside her head, demanding that her body just say it, as Naruto was beginning to loosen his grip. She took this opportunity, she knew it was right. She released her grip, and looked up, causing Naruto's head to fall downwards from its position atop her head, and brought him face to face with her; so close now, that their noses actually touched, immediately causing Hinata's blushing to reach new levels. But she had to finished this one sentance, without breathing, and after a little silent pause where they looked straight into each other;
"I love you...too" she said, as yet more tears began streaming from her eyes. Naruto stayed silent, his newly flowing tears saying more than his mouth could. These tears trickled down his cheeks, and found their way onto Hinata's where their tears combined. With their noses still touching, Naruto brought his hand to her face, being as soft and gently as he could be. As She felt the warmth touch her skin, her instinct was to face its source, but she refused to take her eyes away from his. At the same time, their eyes slowly closed, and after a brief eternity, they each moved forwards to let the other know, this is what they wanted. Their lips made contact with the other's, an uncomparable warmth spread over them both, starting ffrom their lips and coursed through their entire bodies.
To them it seemed forever passed in that moment that they were together. Their lips parted and they opened their eyes again, to see the reaction of the other. Naruto gave her a reassuring smile, seeing this caused Hinata to give one back. Neither wanted to say a word that would spoil this moment, as for them, it was perfection.
They had no interest in returning to the village, they each felt they had everything they needed right next to them. They lay down on the lush grass. Hinata was resting her head on the chest of her beloved, staring up at the sky as she held hands with him. She noticed the cloud that she always saw, the one that resembled Naruto; but today, it was different, there was another cloud besides it.
"Hey Hinata....that cloud up there kinda looks like you" Naruto said chuckling as he pointed up at the sky. Hinata said nothing, but he was pointing next to the cloud that she thought looked like him.
It seemedthe heavens had planed this day all along "...fate...luck...co-incidence..." she thought to herself; "I don't know what brought us to this moment...but I'm thankful for it...even for all the pain...because it led to this moment..." she smiled"
"Because it led to you!"
temjinxzarron
10-16-2004, 01:23 AM
already reviewed on FF.net but really good.
KageNaruto
07-04-2005, 10:05 PM
u r so kool! i dont know why u were shy! love ur story^^ dont be shy about this its rly good^^
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